Marriage Diaries #3: Shower Thoughts

My internal body clock has my eyes wide open by 7am, despite how lethargic I felt the night before or how hard I crashed the moment my head hits the pillow.

At 7am today, he was still fast asleep. I made minimal, barely noticeable movements to extricate myself from the arms that encircled me. Almost always, and always subconsciously, he would realise than I’m getting up and he would pull me back, hold me tighter and lock me in place.

I would always have to call his name in a whisper until his eyes, half-lidded and bleary, acknowledges the silent plea in mine to loosen the iron hold he has on me.

I showered the moment I managed to get out of bed, and as usual, got lost in thought while I lathered and rinsed under the therapeutic, lukewarm water.

When I was done, hair dripping wet and towel completely soaked, I jumped into bed and as usual, started talking to him despite knowing that it was too early for his internal body block.

“Baby, I had a shower thought.”

“Mmm?” He grunted, smiled and extended his arms, beckoning me to lie with him. He cringed slightly when my wet hair touched his skin.

“I’m still a bit wet sorry.”

“You don’t say?”

“Can I share my shower thoughts with you please please please?”

“I’d love to hear it”. He hugged me with both arms and I found myself talking to his chest.

“You’re aging faster than I am.”

He pulled back slightly, looked at me with lucid eyes and furrowed brows, and said, “What?”

“You’re aging faster. Because you’re taller, and that makes you bigger. At least, vertically bigger. And that means you have a bigger surface area. And you know how our cells regenerate, before the ability to regenerate slowly degrades, and that is how we scientifically age? Because you have a wider surface area, you regenerate at a higher magnitude, which also accelerates the degradation of your ability to regenerate. So technically, you age faster.”

“…Okay.”

“But then it’s okay because your skin is like, black, which means you have more melanin, which is the body’s natural mechanism against external aging factors, like the sun. So, it balances things out.”

“…Sure.”

“So in essence, you and I will age at approximately the same rate! Isn’t that great?!”

“Wait. Did you call me black?”

Marriages Diaries #2: Are you disturbed?

I find it amusing how people mistake my mother in law as my actual mother on account of how I look more similar to her than her actual son.

I also find it amusing that I share a lot of my father in law's characteristics such that I find it effortless to bond with that old man. We're also similar in terms of carelessness, values and opinions on the world.

So basically, my dear husband married someone who looks like his mom but acts like his dad.

Disturbing much.

Marriage Diaries: Post #1

Honestly, I miss writing. Let’s try again shall we?

Marriage Life – Diary #1

I’ve been married for slightly over two months now to this dude. He’s really, really good looking and if I were to be honest with myself, I was basically persuaded to tie the nuptial knot thanks to those chiselled features and that toned body of his (“muskels”).

He could be an asshole for all I cared and treated me like dirt but just a flash of those pearly whites and some little flexing and I’d be flying in his arms asking for more domestic abuse.

In all seriousness though, managed to bag a good looking dude who’s really smart, caring and compassionate. So yeah. Hashtag win.

But again, if I were to be honest with myself, I’m not the best wife. I’m calculative (it’s the accountant/audit background, I swear), selfish, only sometimes considerate if I happen to have a brain aneurysm on that day, and I’m very, very petty on certain things.

If I hear even the slightest hint of annoyance in his voice due to something I did that was legitimately annoying, I’d reciprocate by being even more annoyed that he got annoyed.

If he forgets, even for one minute, to help me with my office bags, I’d rebel by refusing to give him the bag when he remembers and saying things like “It’s okay, I’ve managed my expectations” and “Can’t always rely you for things anymore, can I?”

A grade-A bitch, right?

And how does he react to all this? He apologises, tries to make me smile and makes sure that on the days I act like this, before we sleep, he does something that warms my heart and he cuddles me a bit more securely than usual.

If I’m still adamant about being upset over trivial things that aren’t his fault, he stays awake while I blithely go to bed and kisses my forehead lightly when I stir in my sleep, hoping I wake up and hear his faint “I’m sorry”.

I’m not sure what I did right to deserve him.